Vs. 18 – Wives submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. This is NOT something the husband demands from his wife. This is what God asks of the woman in marriage. 1 Corinthians 11:8-9. But then the fall happened in Genesis 3:16.
The pain of childbirth is a reminder to every woman they are a victim of sin.
The second curse is God telling the woman “yet your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you.” What does this mean?
The Hebrew word for “desire” is teshuwqah. It’s used only 2 times in the OT it is used in Genesis 3:16 and Genesis 4:7. Here is what David Curtis has to say about this word in his commentary on Colossians.
“The best textual rendering of this verse is, “Sin will desire to master you (or control you), but you must master it.” The word “desire” used here is the same as that in 3:16. Therefore, 3:16 would rightly read, “To the woman, He said, ‘Your desire will be to control your husband, but he will rule over you.’ The curse is not that man is to rule, that was true from creation. The curse is that the woman would now desire to control.”
This is what the battle of the sexes is about. We as believers should listen to the Spirit from Christ and let it control us. Submission to your husband is a sign of the Holy Spirit’s control in your life and not letting your natural spirit control you.
The woman is for man’s glory. 1 Corinthians 11:7
V19 – Husbands love your wife and do not be harsh with them. Love your wife first. This is difficult because of selfishness, and we love ourselves first.
David Curtis puts it this way. “In this passage Paul puts his finger on the primary role of the husband in marriage. Every man is responsible for what his marriage becomes. This responsibility revolves around his primary role – to give his wife security in his love. Most people feel their marital problems are due to an exceptional misfortune. This is error. Marriage problems are a result of our sin, our failure to live out these commands.” Colossians
Love is not a feeling or an emotion it is an action. Something we do not something we feel. Paul says very clearly in Ephesians that we are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church. Ephesians 5:22-33. Marriage is a picture of Christ and the Church, and we are to treat our wives like Christ treats the church.
“There are two sides to love, giving and receiving. Giving love is the action side, receiving is the feeling side. God made us rational and emotional creatures. He gave us the capacity to feel loved, and, equally important, the ability to choose to demonstrate it.” – David Curtis
Second part of Vs. 19 is do not be harsh with your wife. Other translations say bitter against them or bitter towards them.
As husbands you are to be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, patient. Martin Luther said, “The Christian is supposed to love his neighbor, and since his wife is his nearest neighbor, she should be his deepest love.”
Vs. 20 – Children are to obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. The Greek word for children here does not mean little children (teknia) but is teknon which means offspring. We are to obey our parents as their offspring, meaning even after we are out of their home. As long as they or you live. Not just until you are eighteen.
Read Colossians 3:21-25
Vs. 21 – Fathers do not provoke your children. The Greek in this passage could be understood to mean “parents.” The father is the head so he should lead by example, but mothers need to follow what Paul is saying as well.
Do we as parents deserve obedience? That is the question we ask before we look at our children. We should correct children not by hurting them, but by persuading them.
Vs.22 – First glance this looks like it does not apply to us, but it might. Most translations say Bond Servant, but that means slave.
Slavery during the days of Paul were economical not racial. Slaves were domestic employees who could be cooks, household managers, butchers, butlers and even family physicians. The Master paid all expenses. Most were indentured servants for a 10-to-15-year time period. Commentary on Colossians David B. Curtis.
Ways you acquired slaves was:
Purchase. You could sell yourself into slavery or someone else could do it for you. This was usually to avoid starvation.
Captives of war. It was better than death. Josephus the great Jewish historian became a slave to Rome and wrote many historic books to help people understand Jewish culture and the war of A.D. 70.
Insolvency. Thieves that were found guilty a lot of the time were sold into slavery to pay off their debts.
Vs 23-24 – work for the Lord not for men knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. What inheritance?
The New Covenant is the promise to believers they will inherit the New Jerusalem. The land promise to Israel was not permanent but the new Jerusalem and rest in Christ is.
Read Colossians 4:1-4
Vs. 2 – Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. Watch in what? In prayer. Other translations say alert. To be mindful and vigilant knowing specifically what you are asking for. What he is telling the Colossians here is applicable to Christians today.
Vs 3-4 – Paul also says prayer for us. Who is the us? His team. We will see them here at the end of chapter 4.
Paul is in prison. As stated in the preface to this study he is in prison in Rome, on house arrest.
Read Colossians 4:5-6
Walk in wisdom towards outsiders. Conduct yourselves to “outsiders” (unbelievers) like Christ would and did. Always with grace, seasoned with salt.
“In its ancient Greek usage, salt would often refer to a person’s wittiness. It is not only to be gracious, but also to have an effect. Salt can sting when rubbed into a wound. It also prevents corruption. Believers’ speech should be a purifying influence, rescuing conversation from the filth that so often engulfs it.” – David B. Curtis
…so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. Paul is telling the Colossians to be humble. Show unbelievers why you are different and have the peace that only Christ can offer. People are not going to ask you about your faith unless you demonstrate in your life what makes you different. Be a light in the darkness.
Read Colossians 4:7-18
Vs. 7-8 – Who was Tychicus and Onesimus?
Tychicus traveled with Paul from Ephesus to Jerusalem. Acts 20:4 and was with Paul when he was in prison in Rome. He carried the Epistle to Colossians to Colossae. Paul had a faithful servant in Tychicus.
Onesimus was from Colossae (who is one of you). He was a companion of Paul and Tychicus and help Tychicus carry the letter to the Colossians. Read the book of Philemon and you will see that Onesimus was the runaway slave of Philemon. Paul had a desire to keep Onesimus with him as his “minister” rather than a “slave,” but he would not do so without Philemon’s permission. Philemon 1:15-16. Commentary on Colossians David Curtis
Vs. 10-13 – Who was Aristarchus, Mark, and Justus?
Aristarchus was a Jew in the diaspora and a native of Thessalonica (Acts 20:4; 27:2). In the story in Acts he was seized by the mob who recognized him as Paul’s companion Acts19:29. Also, accompanied Paul on his return to Jerusalem. Paul calls him here “my fellow prisoner” which in the Greek means one caught with a spear.” More than likely, Aristarchus was guilty of breaking Jewish Law and the Jews had him imprisoned with Paul.
Mark was also called John Mark and wrote the Gospel of Mark. He was Barnabas’ cousin was not on Paul’s list at the time of Acts of someone he wanted with them. Acts 15:37-39. But, obviously was restored as one of Paul’s best helpers by the time of Colossians and Timothy 2 Timothy 4:11. Peter probably had something to do with Mark’s change and Paul’s forgiveness. 1 Peter 5:13.
Jesus called Justus is a little obscure. In the New Testament there is only 3 references to Justus, and they are all different people. The only thing we do know about him was he was a Jew just as the others mentioned above.
Epaphrus who we have already mentioned in the beginning of this lesson and was from Colossae. He also carried the letter along with Tychicus. Paul says he prays for the well being and strength of the Christians in Colossae and in Laodicea. Vs. 13 Paul also says he is working hard for you all.
Vs 14-18 – Luke and Demas were faithful Christians who served with him. Luke of course wrote the Gospel of Luke and Acts, but the New Testament only refences him 3 times; here in Col 4:14, 2 Timothy 4:11 and in Philemon 24. Demas is only referenced here and in Philemon. All we know of him is that he served Paul faithfully.
Nympha and the church in her house is called out by Paul. She is obviously opening her home to fellow Christians and Paul is calling her out for that.
Archippus is called out here and is part of Philemon’s household. Philemon 1:1-2.
Vs. 18 – Once again Paul is stating that he is writing the greeting and another indication that he did not write this letter to the Colossians but had is dictated by a scribe. There are only 4 of these greetings in the new Testament (I Cor 16:21-24, Gal 6:11-18, Col 4:18, 2 Thess 3:17-18). Paul always did this to ensure they knew it was him, so he would add a personal letter.
“This seems to indicate that the apostle always picked up the quill and wrote something, because it was an authenticating mark that the recipients could trust as making what had preceded it genuine.” – David Curtis
Remember my chains. This is the only time Paul deliberately asks for their support and prayers while he is in prison.